Frankly….all of this is beyond me.

No the world has not fallen down on me…as I often perceive that it is does from time to time. But still, I really don’t know what to make of things anymore.

It’s a simple question but I have no answer.

Who or what gave you the right to enter my life? I never asked you to come in. I let you in. Then when I wasn’t good enough, you left…just like that. And now, you think you can walk back in…just like that?

I thought you were my friend…but you never were. And now, I am just supposed to understand? Just like that?

It’s true…we never know what the day has in store for us. I certainly never expected this to happen. Yesterday, I had to stay back in office for a 30 second recording that required my presence and took around three hours of overwork. And all that time, I was sitting and staring at my computer…almost in shock. I don’t know why I was so shocked…but I was. Maybe at the sheer audacity of the whole thing. By the time I got home, I knew I was ready to breakdown and I desperately needed to talk to someone…to make sense of things. So I messged the only two people whom I thought would give me some perspective. Hassan was busy at a Majlis yesterday and through my silence, he tried to calm me down with his logic. But he didn’t know what was bothering me…maybe I didn’t know either. Then Ali called me up and somehow he truly calmed me down. Not because he had answers but because he was willing to try. And in his own way…he made me understand that I don’t have to let anyone in my life that can hurt me so terribly with simple acts of thoughtlessness.

The realization has however come too late and I really don’t know what to make of it. I just want to breathe now…